Things Nobody Tells You Before You Get a Great Dane

So, you’re thinking about getting a Great Dane.

Maybe you saw one majestically walking through the park. Maybe you fell in love with those giant floppy ears, long legs, and sweet face. Maybe someone told you Great Danes are “gentle giants.”

All true.

What they may have forgotten to mention is that you’re about to share your home with a 140-pound toddler who believes he is a lap dog.

I know this because I live with Waylon.

And while I wouldn’t trade him for anything, there are a few things I really wish someone had warned me about.

1. Personal Space Is Over

Great Danes do not understand the concept of “near you.” They understand ON you. Waylon can have an entire room available to him and still choose the six inches of space currently occupied by my body. He leans. He sits on feet. He puts his head in your lap. And occasionally, he attempts to put considerably more than his head in your lap.

You may technically own a Great Dane, but your Great Dane will own your personal space.

2. Everything You Own Suddenly Looks Small

Dog bed? Too small. Crate? Too small. Car? Surprisingly small. Couch? Well, apparently you bought that for the dog.Shopping for a giant breed dog is different because regular dog products aren't always designed with 100+ pounds of enthusiasm in mind. You start measuring everything. Will he fit on it? Will it hold him? Can he break it? Can I fit it in my house?

And the question I have learned to ask most often:

Does this come in XXL?

3. The Lean Is Real

If you've never been leaned on by a Great Dane, you may think this sounds adorable. It is. Until you're standing slightly off balance while 140 pounds of dog casually transfers his body weight onto your legs. The Great Dane lean is basically a hug with structural consequences.

And Waylon is very affectionate.

4. Their Tails Should Probably Require a Permit

A happy Great Dane tail is approximately the height of everything you don't want knocked over. Coffee cups. Drinks. Decorations. Small objects. Possibly small children. When that tail starts going, you learn very quickly to clear the area. We call this happiness. Your coffee table may call it something else.

5. You Will Become Weirdly Excited About Finding Something That Actually Fits

The first time you find a harness that fits correctly, you'll want to tell people about it.

Same with a bed big enough for them to stretch out on. Or a toy that survives longer than 17 minutes. Or a car accessory that can handle the hair, drool, paws, and general chaos involved in transporting a Great Dane. That's actually one of the reasons I created Giant Paws Market. Finding products for giant breed dogs shouldn't require twelve browser tabs, a measuring tape, three returns, and a prayer. When we find something that works for Waylon, you'll see our Waylon Approved badge. That means we've actually owned it, used it, and liked it.

Waylon takes his product-testing responsibilities very seriously. Especially when treats are involved.

6. You Will Talk About Poop More Than You Ever Expected

Nobody puts this part in the beautiful Great Dane photos. But giant dog in... Giant dog out.

I'll leave it there. You're welcome.

7. They Are Masters of Looking Completely Neglected

Your Great Dane can be sleeping on an enormous comfortable bed, surrounded by toys, after eating dinner and receiving approximately 47 kisses...

…and still look at you like he has suffered tremendously. Waylon has perfected this. One deep sigh. One sad look. Perhaps a paw placed dramatically across the face. Clearly, no dog has ever been loved less. Five minutes later, he's asleep.

8. Leaving the House Becomes an Event

Taking a giant breed dog somewhere isn't always: “Come on, buddy! Let's go!” It's more like preparing a very hairy toddler for a road trip. Leash. Gentle lead or harness? Water. Bowl. Poop bags. Towels. Treats. Car protection. And depending on your dog and vehicle, possibly a ramp or step.

This is why our Walk & Travel recommendations focus on things that make getting out the door with a giant breed dog a little easier.

Because sometimes the adventure is wonderful. And sometimes the accomplishment is simply getting everyone into the car.

9. They Are Absolutely Ridiculous

This may be my favorite thing about Great Danes. For dogs that look so regal in photographs, they are complete goofballs. The facial expressions. The awkward sleeping positions. The zoomies. The dramatic sighing. The belief that they are significantly smaller than they actually are.

Living with a Great Dane means laughing. A lot.

10. The Biggest Thing About Them Isn't Their Size

This is the part people actually get right. They really are gentle giants. They take up an enormous amount of room in your house, your car, your bed, your budget...

…and somehow an even bigger amount of room in your heart.

Waylon is funny, frustrating, enormous, sweet, ridiculous, deeply loved and a gift from God. Giant breed life isn't always convenient. It certainly isn't tidy. But once you've been loved by one of these oversized goofballs, it's pretty hard to imagine life without one.

And if you're already living the giant-paws life?

Welcome.

You found your people. 🐾

— Terry & Waylon

Giant Paws Market
Big dogs. Big love. Better finds.